Confessions Of A CD mum
By Emma Dalmayne
****Please note : This is a FICTIONAL story written to get the word our more about CD. Anyone who knows me knows that this story would be very hard for me to write and does not in a million years represent how I myself feel for my children.
Please read and let me know what you think, I need the CD mothers to identify with it and hopefully see the harm they are doing. ****
Confessions of a CD mother
When my child was born I felt the most incredible love sweep over me, this little helpless earth angel mine to protect fiercely and I would do so proudly.I like every mother eagerly cut his first curl and took photos of every cherished occurence from his first bath to his first step.How eagerly I awaited my son to call me mama.How despondently I looked on as other babies giggled, crowed and gurgled shrieking dada and mama with abandon that was not appreatiated it seemed by their mothers.
As my beautiful little boy hit the age of two the speech and language therapist I had employed to encourage my son to speak turned to me and pointed to my little sweetheart lining up his cars on the frount room carpet and suggested something that had never occured to me.
I googled and spoke to a family friend who worked specifically with mentally disabled children.The red flags all blew triumphantly in the wind of my despair mocking my maternal promise of keeping son from harm.My worse fears were confirmed nearly eight months later.
The paedatrician told me my son was mentally disabled and would never lead an independant life, would very likely never be able to talk and never get married!!I walked out of that office feeling like my world was finished and no.
I got home driving through tears of desperation knowing that I had made a promise to my baby my boy that nothing would ever harm him.And I would keep it.We would fight it together.I got home and held him tightly vowing to help him, to save him and heal this dreadful injury inflicted on him by the vaccine companies, the enviroment whatever the hell it was that had attacked my baby.I researched Applied Behaviour Analysis, Chelation, and spoke to DAN, Autism speaks and the same message kept coming back to me.
Epidemic. Disorder.My son is not disordered!!
Then my breakthrough came through, the therapy to cure and heal my now heavily stimming son. Sound hurt him and eye contact seared him, I had to help him.I stumbled on a testomony from a mother called Kerri Riviera, she had healed her son who had been aflicted with autism by using a solution called Miracle Mineral Solution. He now spoke! He played, he interracted.He called her mama, he would lead a normal life, get married and know love. Not an existence of being pushed out from society never to go to a prom, never to play baseball or basket ball because Autism had robbed him of his co ordination!I contacted Kerri, eager to hear her words and after talking to her for a consultation on skype where she explained about these disgusting parascitic rope worms that affect the brain-gut connectors I ordered these blessed drops I would give to my son.I got the enema hose from a pharmacy, confident that all I was doing would cleanse my son from this invasion of filthy parasites that were robbing my child of his speech, his very life. A normal life of birthday partys and his first crushes, his exams, college and maybe even university!
I received my MMS drops and began the protocol, joining a facebook group called CD Autism where we all fought the battle against autism and its life robbing little parasites. Photos reguarly posted of parasites that had been flushed out spurred me on, the camaraderie of mothers on a mission to heal their children.My son hated the enemas, they seemed to hurt him as he struggled and cried when I inserted the hose.Coconut oil seemed to help and the nausea he seemed to feel was, I was told normal.Finally normality!! The parasites became a regular sight in the bowl we would use, though the pain I believe he experienced was horrendous.But the size of these parasitic devils! One even came out of him on the way to school and I cried with triumph at the length of it,thanking god I carried spare diapers with me as it had come out dragging a lot of blood with it. Oh it had put up a fight, but we were winning! My brave son was now allowing the administration more readily but still sobbed with discomfort afterwards, I told him how brave he was and that this disease and little monsters were slowly but surely leave him.He was so brave, he would nod tearfully.
There didn't seem to be any improvements though. He stimmed less thats for sure but would get very aggressive, screaming and crying for hours.The bloodied parasites kept coming and the other mothers understood my anguish on my sons behalf. I wanted to save him, I needed despreatly to know I had done everything in my power to help him.Then one day he lay on the towel, legs up to his stomach and looked at me. He looked deep into my eyes, and as we held this wonderful eye contact that I had prayed for a tear slowly snaked down his cheek.A shock ran through me, and it was as if a veil had been lifted! This was my son! What was I doing?! I threw the hose down and gathered him into my arms. He squealed and tried to lay back down in the enema crouch.I told him no, that I was wrong! That there were vitamins, oils anything but this.
I had forgotten my promise, I had hurt my son.Autism hadn't hurt my son! Autism WAS my son! He was everything I'd ever wanted and I had been pulling what I had begun to suspect were reams of inner tissue from him. If one protruded as I eased the hose in I had gently tugged it out wearing gloves, telling him breathe through the pain, its ok it was holding on with its teeth but we would make it let go! Just a little more......I sat and sobbed with disgust as my son looked on terrified.He repeatedly handed me the hose, it was part of his routine now even though it hurt him.I got up and brokenly made my way with the cursed hose and all it represented putting it and the MMS drops in a carrier bag and throwing it in the outside bin.I buried it deep, knowing from the CD group that what we all had done was wrong, yes we could fight autism but with our child! Not at the peril of them.
The next few days were the worse I have seen my boy.He held his stomach crying and passed one last messy bout of what I could clearly now see was blood and mucus.My heart broke for him, and I hated myself deeply for what I had done. I hated Kerri a lot more though.The lies she was telling these vunerable parents and the harm being caused to these children the youngest I had seen being fifteen months old was despicable.There is apparently 163 children 'healed'. Where are they? Why is treatment not better known and why are parents using the protocol being forced to use fake id's, fake locations? Because we despreatly want to help our children but we are being lied to! We are being taken advantage of and we are injuring our innocent children in the process.If my son speaks then fine and we will make that happen be it through an intensive ABA programme or oils that I have been reading about.
For the moment he is happy, he giggles and spins, he is eating his favourite foods after going through a patch after stopping the protocol of not eating at all. He seemed only to crave water and plenty of it, good clean mineral water to clean out the last of what was hurting him.We now use a weighted blanket and I am waiting for an ABA specialist to contact me back.
I hope that my experiences and my sons journey will help someone, anyone who considers using the protocol.I will tell you this: CD does not work. There are no parasites. You will kill your child using this protocol. My sons sodium levels were tested as dangerously low and he was severely ill needing medical interventions after developing a very high fever and febrile seizures. In the CD group they would have been celebrated as the Autism leaving my son, his body finally building immunity! So dangerous, so needless and it needs to be stopped.
Please share this far and wide, take my shame and my sons pain and use it for good. Last of all.....our children have Autism, Autism does not have them!!